Relief As Native Uprising Crushed in London

Billed as a potential "David and Goliath" bout, perhaps the first battle of the European Race War, Anti-Israel Day turned into a woke walkover. Speaking from his Downing St bunker, Chief Sunak of England  slammed "far-right thugs" -indigenous rebels who made a pilgrimage to London to get "preventatively arrested" by the Metropolislam Police. By this superb manoeuvre, 300,000 harmless peaceniks were freed to grace the capital with their presence from dawn till dusk. Allahu Akbar!

Historians and Islamic scholars alike will find it hard to believe the events of November 11th, 2023. For weeks, hundreds of thousands of very special, important people -who can never be criticised for any reason- had planned the latest of a series of joyous, solemn events designed to promote World Peace in a Jewless paradise. These are thoughtful, spiritual folk, who merely want a planet on which everyone else agrees with every single thing they demand -which is not asking much, is it? 

Incredibly, this violent mob vast assembly of well-wishers had their Very Special Day threatened by the barbaric antics of a sleazy crew of primitives (slum-dwelling caucasians) who chose November 11th of all days  to "celebrate" what they claim to be the anniversary of some meaningless tribal victory in a grubby, long-forgotten battle against the Germanic peoples of Eastern Europe. No wonder these deluded fools are called "far-right".

Sadly, despite the limitless opportunities to embrace anti-semitism and/or Allah in any one of thousands of glistening UK mosques  -freely available to Muslims and non-believers alike-  there remains a bitter, twisted rump of "originals" -simple tribespeople who don't give a toss about territorial squabbles on the African continent, and choose instead to pursue their worship of something they call "Civil-Eye-Satan"(a.k.a. civilisation). 

As the name implies, this is a primitive cult of devil-worship, where loyalty is sworn to ancient gods who held the mystic power to invent wheels, exercise mathematics, read and write, build mighty cities, flying machines and other miraculous devices, and who somehow managed to "defend Britain against its enemies" -or so the naive cultists believe. 

Although nowadays they gather only in small, often familial groups, these ignorant savages -there is no better term-  maintain a childlike faith in the grotesque idea of a "nation state". This is all the more tragic, because according to a recent YouGov poll, 137% of  students, scientists and governments agree that "the nation state has no place in our global future". 

Fortunately, the cave-people of London were swept off the streets like the scum Governor Khan knows they are, to make way for his supporters -that cheering throng of Hamas headhunters, Al-Qaeda colonels, Isis Imams, luvvies, climateers and professional queers, without whom no modern globalist  parade is complete. Speaking from his palace in Edinburgh, Chief Yousaf of Scotislam expressed his delight that the native uprising in the south had been swiftly quelled. Chief Sunak also recieved a congratulatory tweet from Chief Varadkar of the Irish Caliphate.

In marked contrast to the "hands-off" approach taken in recent weeks when friendly Islamist hordes swarmed London's train-stations, tube stations and public spaces chanting for genocidal war, videos emerged of well-marshalled heavyweight police battalions driving unarmed natives off the streets using brute force. One particularly striking clip shows a small group of primitive dissidents confronting riot-cops while chanting "You're not English anymore."

"I can't for the life of me understand what they mean," said PC Jemayil-ebo Magyagubo," considering I'm as English as Rishi Sunak."   

[ For further information about your new emperors, read :THE VISITORS WHO STOLE BRITAIN - PART ONE and why not PART TWO  as well.]  

AFTERTHOUGHTS

In the non-aftermath of Anti-Jew Saturday, commentators on all media platforms reminded viewers that "white fundamentalism" is "the major existential threat to Britislamic theocracy". There was unanimous agreement that all future globalist parades will see the native resistance "policed into oblivion". Although many of those arrested this weekend were conspicuously tattooed and chanting incomprehensible slogans, police were "disappointed" to find that nowhere among their captives was the mysterious cult-idol known as "Tommy". 

Sightings of the elusive Tommy were eagerly reported at various "flashpoints" in the capital city, including the vicinity of the ancient totem-pole known locally as the "Cenotaph". In Sunday's newspapers, the forces of "journalislam" were stretched to the absolute limit, with writers twisting language into alphabetti- spaghetti in a desperate attempt to get the words "Tommy" and "crime" into the same sentence.

Alas, the Pimpernel-like "Tommy" was pictured leaving the area of the Cenotaph minutes before he could be framed blamed for anything whatsoever. Informed that his escape was apparently made in a rainbow-striped taxi-cab, loyal followers assured reporters that "Tommy really knows how to take the piss out of wankers like you". 

"It makes no difference to us "said a government spokesimam, "we'll be locking up Tommy for something or other before you can say theocratic fascism".      

"We have learned a lot about these primitive peoples in recent years" said a spokeslug for the Metropolislam Police, adding "we are in talks with the Home Office regarding the creation of purpose-built "reservations" in the UK countryside where the remaining native British population could be re-homed in traditional slums. Given enough space- and beer, obviously, they would be free to pursue their ancestral lifestyle in isolation from the global majority. It is anticipated that deprived of an urban habitat, the far-right would struggle to reproduce in the wild. The species, it is hoped, would thus be rendered extinct..

Asked if he was interested in helping facilitate this plan, Welsh First Minister Mark Drayford said "Not in my backyard, boyo -we're after making Wales a sanctuary country for all the world's best and brilliant immigrants, look you. English not welcome."

In other news, a man in a suit and tie appeared on a TV channel to say something was a terrible disgrace, but declined to explain exactly what, where or why. 

Ian Andrew-Patrick

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